Let’s talk about language.
Or more specifically, let’s talk about the language we use to describe each other in a world dominated by social media. How do our words affect our opinions? And how do they prevent us from learning?
The more I use social media, the more I am aware of how the words we choose influence our views of others. Words shape our thoughts: they inspire hope, bring comfort, instil prejudice, and generate emotion. What we say (and how we say it) has a profound effect on the way we interact.
When the language we use shuts down our ability to hear, understand, or accept a different point of view, it limits our ability to learn from others.
Social media has created an unprecedented platform for the world to air its views. Of course, there are many positives to be gained through online networking. We use social media as a call to action – drumming up support for a needy cause – or as a lifeline to connect friends and family, from down the street to half a world away. It’s a marketplace and business hub or an avenue to share photos, poetry, art, and prose. I am using social media to convey this message, and you are using social media to read it.
But while it may be an excellent outlet for debate and discourse over news and entertainment (fact or fake), social media also allows division without measured conversation. And when the language we use shuts down our ability to hear, understand, or accept a different point of view, it limits our ability to learn from others.
When we call someone an alarmist or denier, greenie or capitalist, activist or moderate, socialist or capitalist, we put them in a box labelled ‘Other’. They are no longer part of our world view. They don’t share our opinion, so we have nothing left to say (unless it’s abuse hurled from the safety of our living room). But this blinkered reaction, which assumes we should all pick a side (and if you’re not on my team, you’re crazy or stupid or ignorant or worse), builds walls between us, and the lessons we can learn from each other are lost.
If we assume we’re right and they’re wrong, why should we change our language and ditch the labels? Why can’t we vent, sanctimoniously, from behind the keyboard, secure in the belief that our opinions are correct? Why? Because while labels are one-dimensional, people are multifaceted – each of us holding a wealth of knowledge and experience. Why is this important? Because knowledge is power. And when emotive language and name-calling create division, the door is shut on meaningful, impartial conversation – we lose knowledge, and we lose our collective power.
If our road trip of life is to be a success, we need the devil’s advocate to help plan the journey.
One could argue, ‘I don’t need their opinions or their input; my point of view is right because my information is correct.’ However, this reasoning is flawed because if our road trip of life is to be a success, we need the devil’s advocate to help plan the journey. Our antithesis forces us to examine other, potentially crucial, angles, tapping us on the shoulder before we set off on our way, asking, ‘Do you see what happens if you take this fork in the road?’ To succeed on our path, to truly understand the way ahead, with a greater knowledge of potential outcomes, we need to spend a little time in the other person’s shoes.
So, how do we start a conversation between opposing camps once lines have been drawn? We check our language, remove the labels, and change the narrative. Instead of making assumptions, we ask questions.
Can I step into your shoes? Will you step into mine?
The next time you find yourself in a ‘WTF???’ moment (rolling your eyes and shaking your head), take a second to remove the label (denier, alarmist, nutter, leftie, greenie, right-winger, townie, redneck, racist, idiot) and begin a dialogue instead:
- Why do our standpoints differ?
- How did you reach your position?
- What shapes your thoughts?
- What is your history? Your home life? Your work life? Your quality of life?
- Are you disillusioned or happy in your world? Can it be improved? How do our worlds differ? Does this cause resentment?
- What knowledge do you hold?
- What experiences can you share? How do they affect your stance?
- Where did you get your information? Where did I get mine?
- Why does our information clash? What about the sources of our collective information?
- Can we combine our knowledge to reach a logical, successful, or mutually beneficial conclusion?
- Can I step into your shoes?
- Will you step into mine?
Whether or not we get an answer to these questions (perhaps we ask them only in our heads), in our attempt to understand the ‘Other’, we begin to shift from a pattern of dismissive discord and division to one of learning, openness, and understanding. We don’t all have to agree (we don’t even have to like each other), but when we open ourselves to the knowledge and experience of others, sharing our wisdom in the process, we all become stronger and better equipped to face the journey ahead.
